Every December I spend some time in prayer to ask God what He has for me for the upcoming year. I ask for a word or promise to hold onto for the next year. Sometimes I get a word right away and it is clearly from the Lord. Other times I think it may be my own thought or something I am hoping for. Either way, God has used these words and honored them. Here are my words for the last few years:
2017 ASSURANCE—a positive declaration intended to give confidence; a promise
2018 CONNECT
2019 STAY
In 2017, I changed jobs and my confidence in God (ASSURANCE) grew as He continued to fulfill promises to me of healing and health. In 2018, God fulfilled His word to me by fostering deeper CONNECTION and intimacy in the community I am in, guiding me in empathy and compassion to CONNECT with clients at both my jobs, and leading me to start dating and CONNECT to my current husband! In 2019, I entered the year an anxious mess. I didn’t know how to do this whole relationship thing, never mind do it well. I also didn’t know how to sit in my feelings without pushing them away. My word was STAY and it sounded super challenging. God was calling me to STAY in relationship with Corey instead of running when things were scary and hard. He was calling me to STAY in my feelings instead of running from them and shutting them down with coping skills. He was calling me to STAY present in both my jobs through the challenges and to continue to hope for kiddos that most others declare as hopeless. I can’t say that I did it perfectly, but what I can say is that I feel more now than I have in over a decade (back to my sensitive, compassionate spirit), I declare hope over my kids and advocate on their behalf (even standing up to other agencies when they refuse to help), and I am now fricken MARRIED to my wonderful, amazing husband!!!!! I chose to STAY when it was really hard for me and with God’s help, I was able to do it!
This year, as we enter a new decade, I feel God’s word to me to be RELEASE. Though I have worked through a lot in the past decade, I still strive to control situations, people, myself, numbers, and still at times my emotions. I am still fearful of punishment and have an intense need to please others. I want to follow the rules out of fear of punishment and disappointing others. God is calling me to RELEASE all of this. When I ask God what I need to do and what the plan is in order to truly RELEASE, I feel Him tell me to rest, have grace upon grace for myself (John 1:16), and trust Him daily because it’s not my job to fulfill my word and promise from Him, it’s His job. So today, as I prepare for this new year 2020, I choose to RELEASE control to my good and perfect Heavenly Father and trust and rest and see what He does! ❤️
Romans 7:6
“But now we are RELEASED from the law, having died to that which held us captive, so that we serve in the new way of the spirit and not in the old way of the written code.”
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